Mummy boy

As you know, Manfred was formula-fed baby, I only pump-fed him up to 1month old. With Jude. He was exclusively on breastfeeding for 6months, and I continue to breastfeed him till 2yo. During then I even have surplus to give it to Manfred that was bout 18months old.

I intend to bf Nate as long as I can. N today day 20, I finally get my breast pump out as start extra pumping season 2times a day. To keep some breastmilk in case I need to be away running errands. I pump out 1.5oz after feeding Nate. M&J was both watching me pumping.

*before Nate came along, Jude being the mama boy actually already asking to be breastfed, from my breast some more!

He saw that 1.5oz, he said he wants to drink it. I let him, and told him he must not waste it. He really bottoms up from the bottle, and asking for more. I think he must have miss the bonding of me feeding him.. I am grateful that despite he was clingy as a baby, the weaning process was rather easy one. And he seems to do just fine seeing his little brother being fed, I was at first bit worried he will be jealous. :p

As for Manfred, I asked if he wants to drink my breast milk, express it out for him of course. He bluntly reply me:”DUTCH LADY MILK BETTER LA!”

Off booby duty-updated

I mentioned Jude was 99.9% weaned and I did raise my concern of relapsed…

Some days, I suddenly miss the breastfeeding bonding session. I almos wanted to bf him. But I held back as I know it will not be fair to give it to him and complicate the weaning..

So a week passed, 2weeks passed……. I can’t recall how long… Yesterday, I asked him:”Jude, you want mummy nen nen?”
*he looked up the ceiling and gave me his extremely cheeky grin* and said:”Don’t want!”

Okay, I was Hurt… You know it’s nice to know someone is needy towards you.. (selfish thought! Slap myself) and I thought he might changed his mind.

Ask again. Again A firm “don’t want!”


Jude officially no longer need mummy booby!!!


Off *booby* duty

Yes, My precious no2 is 99.99% weaned off my boobs. What’s with Thr 0.01%? Scared got “relapse” MA.

What method I use? No spicy stuffs, as He can even eat rice with kimchi soup…. I just told him mummy no nen nen already, Jude big boy, drink bottle nen nen like kor kor, and I let him drink from bottle together with kor kor….

Finally we almost at the end of brightly lite tunnel…. 🙂 lots more
Freedom for myself and Pil or my parent could enjoy more of his company wo my presence. He develop a stronger bond with both grandparents now. He no longer cling to me like koala when other people is around. He is more sociable…… He is still entertaining as usual…..

Jude, thanks for giving mummy a wonderful breastfeeding experience. It was a special bond and journey we been through together. Mummy love you.

Weaning process update

I have started to try to wean Jude off my breast.. Well, at least for the day time. While I am away he is ok and he doesn’t look for me or the boob fix. But the moment I stepped into the house, he will follow me tightly and keep harrass me by saying :” Mummy nen nen” endless time till everyone also get annoyed.

It’s okay if he still want to suckle. I know my milk production is very little already and no way he can thrive solely depending on my breast milk, So introduce Pediasure to him since 3 months back. He still take only pathetically 3oz each feed, 2-3times daily. Also always left 1oz. And during the process is like “force feed”.  How much formula should a 19months old toddler taking? He still weigh around 11.8KG, 85cm tall. Compared to Manfred he is rather petite. Really petite.. Manfred weigh 12kg when he was 9months old.

Don’t mean to compare. Don’t mind if he is smaller in size. But taking 7to 10oz daily.. isn’t it a little bit too little? And add on to weaning stress, my breast engorged to stone hard last week(before menses). I had to let Jude suckle almost whole 24hours to get rid of the engorgement. Then right after menses the engorgement came AGAIN!!!! Wow! Big time torture as I was away the whole afternoon from Jude.. Imagine how miserable I was………

And best is…. MIL keep telling me try the medicated oil method. Put some spicy medicated oil on my breast and let him suckle. According to MIL Jude will flee big time and will never ask for the boob again. I didn’t quite think that will work. And true enough. No effect on him at all.. he even took over the bottle of medicated oil and start sniffing with his nose… grin at me some more… How to wean?

Anyhow, no hurry… since he is okay without the breast at noon oredy. Just hope I could slowly “talk” him out of it…. in exchange, he must take some formula ok?

Why milk production so little..

My milk production been on Yo-Yo effect. The days that i been away from Jude, I still manage to pump out 24-28oz a day… So it’s very sufficient to provide for Jude daily milk intake.

Then come the wound problem whereby i only can nurse on my right breast, but I still express out the left breast milk… Stil can get 12-14 oZ per day from my left breast… So i suppose still can provide right?
Then when the wound healed, I started to nurse him direct. He cries sometimes as if he is complaining bout the slow flow of my breast. and He suckle very very hard to get more milk….. So i have no choice to top up with EBM and give him in bottles. He happily finishes 2-4oz from bottles.. And many times also he will request to have top up with bottles…

I am now nursing him on demand…. not much for storage liao… I see the storage i have can’t even last for him up to 1 year.. 😦 SO SO SO SAD… I can’t even bf him up to 1YEAR OLD!!! How to achieve 2 year old target?!!!! I have been drinking tea sacred tea for nursing mum to boost my supply… it seems to increase a little, but i don’t think it’s sufficient to go fully on my breast milk..:( I feel like I am back to confinement again..

Yesterday I nursed him around 10times from my breast, yet i still have to give him total of 15oz of formula plus EBM…. and He even had porridge for breakfast, apple oat for lunch, biscuits for tea time, dinner he had fish with rice…

Please nursing mom out there, give me light and support and advise!!!!! I need it!! so need it!! if I weaned him now I will regret for the rest of my life… I just love to drag as long as I can to weaned…… HELP! any one got same problem before can share what to do?

When I was away from M&J

I was from my M&J for 3d3N. I am not worried about Manfred as I know he is a very well adjusted boy. He is very fine and happy when he is with my parent. But I constantly worried bout Jude for the fact that he is very clingy to me, and he usually cries when somebody else carry him.

We did some rehearsal session(I left both them with parent on few occasion for few days). Things seems to be fine and working before I left for my Tioman. I left on thursday night after I nursed Jude. 1st worry Jude will fuss.
2nd worry Jude will not drink milk. 3rd worry, Jude will fuss.. ahahahaha
Manfred I only scare he is bored. Which my parent and my brother and sister makes a huge crew of making their weekend a fulfilling one! They went hot air balloon fair, went shopping in Aeon and etc.. I was greet by a very happy toddler with huge smile on his face on sunday night! While I was away, brother also make effort to mms me pictures, videos of both of them.. I am really glad, thankful and blessed to have my family that loves my kids as much as I do.

My worried bout JUDE? Turns out I was over paranoid. He finishes all the 16bottles of EBM i prepared. Happily nap, play, eat, poop, and go out with my parents.. I was told he even sat on potty every morning. Again Jude greets me with a big great smile when I was back home! And he head straight for my boobs since it was away for so long.. hahhaa I miss that bonding so much….

And funny thing is. I have problem express milk when I am home. Always take very long to trigger the let down. For the period that I am away, I express every 3-4 hours. And every time it takes less than 15 to express both side. And the let down come almost instantly!! And each time I collect around 4 to 5 oz. Morning session I can collect 6-9oz!!! So again I know i am still producing enough milk… I can continue to nurse Jude as long as I can..

I discard around 5-6bottles of EBM in Tioman. Coz I have no place to store the milk….. I worried the fridge in hotel is not cold enough to store the milk for 3 days…

No Milk??

Jude is now 8mths old. He is still exclusively breastfeed… He is taking in more solids now. He eats whenever he sees Manfred eats. My mensus came last week…. Very heavy flow and make me so bad mood….. So used to no mensus… Sigh…

I haven’t been pumping milk for very long… I tried to pump once every morning, just to store some surplus in the fridge so when I am away he could drink from bottles.. MAybe because I don’t pump regularly, it’s been difficult to empty my breast and everytime I pump i only get pathetically 2oz or 3oz.. but I can feel my breast is still rock hard but just so so os difficult to trigger let down with the breast pump.

Last night, I call an panic attack and left Jude away from me for more than 12 hours. I will be away in May or 3 days and there’s no way I could bring Jude along with me. Finally I realize now should be the time to start training him off my breast for longer time, and train him to sleep without my breast, without me by his side. I fed him at 8pm, and I go MIA… I heard him cried… for an hour.. crying for me.. he refuses to drink.. at the end he went to bed without milk… so sad…… but I have to hang on….. midnight I heard him waking up crying.. but my mum told me he went to bed without taking milk again… then in the morning, he woke up very hungry and finally drink up 5-6oz at 1 go.. that’s a good start….

I will now have to slowly put him away from me for 1-2 days, then slowly 3 days. just to let him know he could be with someone else, still contented and well taken care off….

Back to pumping milk, after 1 hours of pumping.. Finally i manage to empty my breast, total of 6.5oz… morning I woke up with engorge breast, I got 8.5oz…. then after 2hours i pump again, there’s another 3oz… So I guess I stil got plenty of milk… *grin* Just have to back to regular pumping..