Control

I am a control freak. I like things to be within my control, it gives me sense of security knowing things will be alright as “planned”.

So when things did not happened the way I “expected” or planned to be, I get pretty upset.

Well, a person whom got something to learn will somehow learn something. In desperation, I have to learn to let go. For the first time in my life, I am letting go of control in many things in my life. I am learning to break free, not to let things burden me or stop me from feeling happy or live life happily.

I wake up each day knowing and praying that God will provide in His own way, I go to bed each day thanking Lord that I get another day extra and pray for another day more… 1step at a time, 1thing at a time, I know God has planned for when the “time” will come.

Dear lord, come to my aid for you are my only saviour.

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Just some updates

Can’t believe it’s another 2weeks plus and we will be celebrating CNY already. It’s sad yet true to say the excitement of CNY is so much lesser nowadays. I could still remember when I was a kid I used to be so excited and thrill to welcome CNY. The new clothes, ang paus, the mandarin, goodies, so on so forth….

Anyway, I decided I shouldn’t let my own lack of excitement affect my kids. I googled where can watch lion dance and plan to bring my boys to see it.

This morning Jude surprise me with his vocabulary again. He recognize octopus and volcano. Both he speaks with perfect pronunciation.

Random

Such roller coaster emotion as I realize it’s December of 2010 already. I love my life as at now.. Still I can’t help to feel depress sometimes. Is this normal?

So much happened in 2010. Let’s not talk about whether it’s something to be jolly or not. But I certainly grow wiser.

Now it’s time to reflash 2010 and think of 2011 resolution! Of course I shall not forget to plan for how we gonna celebrate and welcome 2011!

I do not need people to justify

A lot of decision in life, one should learn to make it and learn to live with consequences that comes with it.

Do not judge me by all the while thinking:“I know better…. You should….”
Honestly, a lot of times things people said has already been through my mind. I am ready for it. No one can ever be certain of what lies in future for us. Beside God.

No one guaranteed which path to be chosen that leads to fairy tale ending.. In fact life isn”t about living to fairy tale ending. Life to me, is about living up to your own expectation….. Embrace each happy moment and challenge with pride and chin up all the time…

STOP judging my decision. Period

Buy less, consume less, preserve more..

Ever realize most people have same problem? Once you move into a new place, there’re plenty of space and the “chi” in the house is good.. Sometimes you might feel you have too much “space” and feel the need to “fill it up” a little…

Went shopping and gradually will purchase little by little to fill up those space… Then some of the stuff just start to pile up and more and more clutter…. Toys is a good example. Kids outgrown toys extremely fast.. Especially when toys nowdays serve many educational purpose too.. So you always have very good and justifiable reason to buy the next TOY!!!

That’s it… I think remaining space I have is really really limited… I should start to buy less, consume less and preserve more… After all, many stuffs at home can be used to make own toys…. helps on kids creativity also mar…  see this kiddo and his mummy and you will know why…..

Rant rant

Tell a story…..

A is born poor…. She barely has a full plate of rice on daily basis.

B has little extra in plate to offer.. But she need extra pairbof hands.

A was given an opportunity to work for B.
Whom make sure she has a comfy place to sleep, 3 full plate of meals daily.. Sometime got teatime some more. In return A need to take over some chores from B.

After sometime.. A forget about gratefullness… She start to forget that that full plate is something she has to work for…. She start to complain about that plate of food… Thinking she deserve something better and she can get something better..

B send her right to where she is… How does A do after that? I dont know. But just remember, dont take things for grantef. Anything we have now can be gone in a snap….. Think again…..